21 Comments
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Crabby Hermit's avatar

Totally understand - it’s hard to be kind when you’re not feeling great. You’re not alone, and you’ve done such great work to build a supportive community around you that can lift you up in tougher times.

Agree with Adam about finding other ways to exercise, and get those endorphins pumping - it’s self-care.

Another suggestion: when I was feeling down over Christmas, I made a list of all the little annoying DIY things that were bothering me around the house, and fixed a few each day. Was nice to have a bunch of “little wins” to get a sense of achievement each day. Was surprisingly satisfying. Doesn’t have to be DIY, just little accomplishments that help quiet the negative voices.

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Ben Alexander's avatar

Great advice Trudie! Little wins add up

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James Mathers's avatar

We must meet up !

Firstly, most of us have made a few financial mistakes!

Secondly, there are many business opportunities out there. Many ! You have proven your strength, resilience, discipline and commitment. You have great credentials. It’s time to make a move.

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Ben Alexander's avatar

We must! When are you in Canberra next?

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James Mathers's avatar

I will try to get down in a few weeks. I have a cattle property in Queensland and have a few days up there drenching.

I will be in touch .

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Adam's avatar

Hey Ben,

I appreciate your writing.

If you’re the kind of person who finds exercise a positive then please don’t let injury stop you. Train upper body, train the other calf ( evidence to suggest your injured calf will benefit ) or just get in the gym and do what you can and socialise?

Best wishes

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Ben Alexander's avatar

Good advice Adam and will do.

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James Mathers's avatar

Wow. Can I say toughen up !

1. I doubt you have made many serious mistakes. Leave those little things behind.

2. I’m sorry for your family’s loss . Tough times.

3. I understand the bed thing!

4. You have twin daughters. You are blessed. I have twin sons . I’m blessed.

5. Find a project, go back to university, start another business, it’s an exciting world. I’m trying to find the right person to start my food truck business. I’ve found a great lady however she hasn’t called. I won’t give up ! I like food trucks ! No rent!

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Ben Alexander's avatar

You can! And I’ve made one serious financial one that one gets too me when I’m tired. And I’m currently pretty tired from everything that’s happened and the uncertainty about my career.

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Ben Brearley's avatar

Might as well be kind when you're not tired too!

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Ben Alexander's avatar

I’ve found it easy to be kind to myself when I’m feeling good

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Ben Alexander's avatar

Good point. Also, how did you working with Nick Crocker? I saw he reached out to you in July 2022

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Ben Brearley's avatar

Hey Ben, yeah I had a chat with Nick last year - nothing in the works at the moment.

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Ben Alexander's avatar

What did he ask?

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Ben Brearley's avatar

Nothing specific, just chatting about the coaching work I do

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Clare Carey's avatar

ohhhh yes! one of my friends sent this to me last month and it wasn't long after I had watched The Weight of Gold on Stan. How sad that he feels emptyness when he looks at his medal. It just shows the achievement isn't everything because you could have no silverware but so many fond memories of your journey trying to win silverware.

Big share today Ben! Thank you as always for your honestly and vulnerability.

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Ben Alexander's avatar

You’re welcome Clare. Thanks for your support

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Sarah Hunter's avatar

Ben, are you sure that going over past mistakes will put them behind you? Instead of reinforcing those neural pathways of negativity, why don’t you muse on the good things you hope to achieve, and strengthen those pathways instead? (They don’t need to be business related.)

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Ben Alexander's avatar

No I’m not. But perhaps by sharing them in hope they’ll prevent other people from making the same ones might. But I agree, and will stay focused on the good things once I’ve written about the mistakes I’ve made

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Sarah Hunter's avatar

Fair enough. Being able to help others avoid the same mistakes can sit in the positive side of that ledger, for sure.

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Sam Wilson's avatar

Universe is real. Tomorrow’s a new day, but by the sounds of things you’re already on the way back.

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